


The fight of our live's been drawn to this undying love

by bulletsandroses



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: AU, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Revolution AU, Romance, Slow Burn, a lot of fluff, also bellamy and harper are brotp, bellamy brotps with everyone, just bellamy being a dad to everyone as they try to save the world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-24
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-09-26 13:33:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9899450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bulletsandroses/pseuds/bulletsandroses
Summary: Bellamy Blake knows war will begin at any moment and he has to be ready. He is also stuck with a bunch of teenagers led by a bossy, annoying and brave blonde.ORBellarke Revolution AU where Clarke wants justice and Bellamy just wants them all to end up in one piece.





	1. I can hear it like a jilted crowd

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Viva la Gloria! from Green Day.

_This city's burnin'_  
It's not my burden  
It's not over before it's too late

 

Everything went quiet after the first bomb fell.

Bellamy should have been ready, he should have seen it coming, but he didn’t. He was too busy trying to look for his sister, his stupid sister who had decided to run into the crowd at the March against the Government even though she knew better. She knew what was going to happen if they infuriated the Mayor. And they succeeded. He was _pissed._

Bellamy was tall enough to see over most of the heads, but his sister was a sneaky one. Damn it, he had murmured over and over again, too busy calling her name to even pay attention to the buzz in the air, the characteristic smell that he should have recognized. And then the bombs were falling from the sky and there was chaos.

He coughed and tried to get up, looking around. Everybody was quiet; not even daring to move, but Bellamy knew the symptoms of the situation. He had caught them too late, but he was ready to face the second bomb, there was going to be a second bomb, if not a third, but he wasn’t sure when that was going to happen. Two minutes after the first bomb exploded in the middle of the crowd, Bellamy knew there were going to be more of them. No one drops a single bomb in the middle of a protest that about two thousand people were attending.

It smelled like fire, like burned meat and death. But Bellamy was too shocked, his eyes wide observing the place, looking for a hint that could take him to Octavia. And then a kid was screaming, breaking the silence with a loud cry that went right through Bellamy’s skin and into his heart, making it skip a beat.

It was desperate, sad, and it belonged to a _fucking_ child. Bellamy didn’t think it twice before being the first one to run to the little kid, her face completely dark and full of blisters. She was a completely mess, Bellamy thought, and so were the people around her.

“Hey, hey, calm down” he murmured, taking the girl in his arms and onto his knees. She looked like she hadn’t hit 15 years old yet. Her arms were wounded and her whole body was burning, but the worst part was her face.

Everyone began to move almost immediately, trying to get to a safe place before the bombs continued.

“Don’t move, don’t move” Bellamy whispered while trying to lift the kid up, her body still trembling and sobbing uncontrollably. He tried to pet her hair in order to calm her nerves, dusty and tangled, a dark brown colour that matched her skin tone. But she continued crying, her hands clutched on the edges of his leather jacket.

“Calm down, okay? I got you now, please stop crying” he murmured on the girl’s ear, and then a guy almost pushed him off the bank he was laying against, so Bellamy just tried to cover the girl up. He hit his back with a couple of rocks, but didn’t care.

“DON’T MOVE! IF YOU WANT TO SURVIVE, DON’T MOVE FROM WHERE YOU ARE!” he yelled into the air, not knowing if he was even being listened. He knew the probabilities of a bomb being dropped at the same exact place where another one had been were really low. That’s why Bellamy didn’t move a finger from the girl’s body and just held her in his arms, listening to her whining.

“What do you mean?” Bellamy almost jumped when another man was next to him, noticing him, so Bellamy shook his head. He had his knee on the ground next to him and he was hurt too, his whole arm burned and the skin around the wounds already peeling off. But his eyes were true and sincere and he had listened. He wanted to survive.

“We can’t move. The bombs will follow them and then if they drop another one it will be where there is the biggest concentration of people” Bellamy began. He knew it by heart. He had been through years of training.

“They shouldn’t go to the park” the man agreed. But Bellamy couldn’t stop them all because he himself was already shaking, fear in his veins as if it was blood, his heart racing. Where was his sister? He needed to know if she was okay, he needed to stop her. He just cared about his sister; he didn’t even want to take part in the protest.

“Can you help me with this one?” Bellamy asked the man instead, lifting the girl’s arm and putting it around his neck. The man took her other arm and together, they laid her down on the grass. Bellamy looked around once more. As if Octavia was about to appear. But he only saw crying, and death, and darkness.

“I’m Miller. Nathan” he said. Bellamy smiled. It wasn’t the time, or the place, but he realized he liked Miller. Not just physically speaking (his big eyes and that sharp jaw and his shoulders as they tensed up carrying the girl’s weight). He liked how he had listened to him, and how he wanted to help him. He shook Miller’s hand and coughed.

“Bellamy. Bellamy Blake”. He returned his attention to the girl, who was mouthing something. “Stop crying, please. It only makes it hurt more” he murmured against the girl’s hair. And he swore he heard her count to ten.

“That’s it, darling…” he encouraged her, and he crossed a look with Miller. The boy had a worried look on his face and Bellamy swallowed, knowing what he was thinking. She wasn’t going to make it. She had screamed and screamed and Bellamy knew she wanted to fight, but her face was too hurt, her chest too burned, _fuck this world._

“I… I can’t breathe” she murmured, her voice broken and harsh. Bellamy took her tiny hand in between his owns and closed his eyes.

“I’ve got you, remember? I’ve got you, darling, you can do this” he said against the palm of her hands. _Please don’t die in front of me because you are a kid and it is unfair._

“Bellamy, she is…” Miller began, and Bellamy looked up to the girl, whose mouth was partially open. He quickly checked her neck, looking for a pulse. There was a pulse. It was too weak to even dare to move here somewhere else, but she was alive. It felt like hope.

“Talk to me” Bellamy prayed, biting his lip. Around them, the world was in fire and chaos and everyone was lost, looking for salvation. Bellamy wished he was wiser. He also wished he had the equipment to cure her.

“Maia…” he heard her. It was barely a whisper, too weak, more like a sigh. “I’m… Maia”

“Good, Maia. I’m Bellamy. I’m going to take you somewhere safe, alright? You’re doing great, you are doing great. You are so brave”

“My… brother” she mouthed back, and Bellamy looked up to Miller, who was helping a girl that had also nothing to lose. So she had decided to stay with them and save herself. Bellamy stroked her hair gently. She was feverish and already showing symptoms of dehydration. _Bloody hell._

“We’ll find him” he pledged. “I have a sister too. Her name is Octavia, did you know? I’ve also lost her, but with each other’s help we will find them both” he said, trying to sound cheerful. His inside was completely broken. That girl needed help or they were going to lose her. And he couldn’t get help until the bombing stopped.

“What are they waiting for?” Miller screamed through the noise. The other girl, who seemed like she was Octavia’s age, shrugged. She was tall and skinny and her t-shirt showed she was taking part in the protest. Octavia had a pin with the same revolutionary logo.

“I don’t know. I just hope he is right” she answered, her voice clear. She pointed at the girl. “What happened?”

“What do you thing happened?” Bellamy snapped. “The fucking bomb that you made the government drop, that’s what happened!”. The girl raised an eyebrow.

“I know her, you know. She is the daughter of one of the High Ministers. She shouldn’t be here” she spitted back, turning her back on him. Bellamy shook his head and continued whispering stupid things on the girl’s hair. Why the hell was she there, if the other girl was right?

Revolution only affected poor people. High Ministers and their families were anything but poor.

“Harper” Miller warned her, and the girl relaxed her shoulders, but her gaze was still cold towards Bellamy. Like he cared.

“Come on, come on” he prayed for it to stop. But the buzzing was too loud, or maybe his ear had been hurt during the explosion. However, the world liked to prove Bellamy Blake right, so when the second bomb was dropped less than eight hundred metres away he was ready, and grabbed Millers hand to pull him next to him, surrounding the girl in a tight embrace.

He felt the other girl, Harper, shudder and rolled his eyes, taking her by the waist and pulling her down too quickly enough so that she didn’t fall. The floor trembled during a couple of minutes and then another bomb was dropped.

That one was further from the place, and Bellamy knew it had hit the Park. But right at that moment he was protecting three people and couldn’t think of her sister. He had work to do.

“Are you all okay?” he yelled, his eyes looking around. There was an awful fog full of ashes but, apart from that, everything was silent again. Bellamy could swear they were the only ones left at the street.

Harper stood up, her braid moving onto her shoulder. She looked fierce, full of energy, and she was pissed, so she began kicking the rocks around her, rocks that once belonged to old buildings. Bellamy sighed. Those houses would need to be reconstructed from the ashes and there was not money to do so. _Are you really thinking about the architecture when all you can see are dead bodies on the ground?_

“This is the worst protest ever” Miller murmured, and Bellamy coughed something that looked like a laugh. The little girl, Maia, was paler than ever. Bellamy tried to lift her up, but her screams broke into the air like knives. Even Harper opened her eyes at the horrible sound of her crying, but continued kicking around.

“Will you stop?” Bellamy groaned, and Harper huffed.

“What are you, my dad? Besides, who cares? When the Walkers arrive, they will catch us and in less than two hours we will be either dead or prisoners. Not her, of course” she bitterly added. Bellamy knew that was not how it worked. Walkers wouldn’t arrive until tomorrow, and by then he expected to be far away from Arkadia.

“Walkers?” Maia suddenly murmured, and Bellamy held her onto her lap.

“Government police. Don’t worry. Do you know where your parents are?” Bellamy asked back. She didn’t need to worry.

“Mom… dead. Dad… working. Mi… minister”. Miller swore under his breath and Bellamy could feel Harper’s wide smile, but she didn’t say anything.

“My brother” she continued. Bellamy nodded.

“I know, I know, we’ll get him” he said. He felt her weaker and weaker, almost feeling her breath leave her body. He knew he was late, he knew there was nothing he could do but hold her, but still, he had hoped… he had hoped to save her.

And then, Maia was gone, cold and dead in his arms, her pretty, young face burned and calm. Bellamy let her quickly on the ground, cleaning his own hands on his trouser. He didn’t cry. He couldn’t. Miller looked up at him and offered him a hand, but Bellamy could only look down at Maia’s body.

Everything he could think of was that she was dead, and Octavia might too if he didn’t hurry up and look for her.

“Mate” Miller called him. “We need to get to a safe place. Harper might be right” he whispered, but Harper was far from them and couldn’t hear them. She was too busy finding the body of one of her friends and had just begun swearing out loud.

“You are the one who knows her” Bellamy said back. What had he done wrong to be in that situation? He started walking nowhere, looking for a hit of hair that belonged to his sister. It was stupid. She might not even be there, but Bellamy had nothing left. He had something aching in his chest, maybe it was the fact the daughter of a High minister had died in his arms. And he wanted to save her. He didn’t even hate her for having everything he was denied as a kid. He just wanted to save her and he couldn’t. Her death was on him.

“Where are we going?” he heard Harper ask.

“We? You can go whenever the hell you want, you can do whatever the hell you want. I don’t give a fuck” Bellamy answered, bluntly, and Harper made a face, crossing her arms.

“You are a dick”

“I guess that makes two of us” he replied, looking up to the sky. It was clearing up.

“What about the body?”

“Maia knew what she was getting into” Harper spitted, and Bellamy felt an infuriating feeling in his veins.

“How dare you? She was a kid! It could have been you, you know?!”

“It isn’t my fault that the rich girl is dead, okay?” Harper yelled at him, throwing a small pebble to his feet. It hit his ankle and Bellamy turned to her, slowly. Harper had another rock in her hands and was frowning at him. She was brave. She was like a fire, and there were a lot of fire points around them so that Bellamy could compare Harper to one of them. But even with her face in a hateful glare towards him, she was beautiful and fierce and she was so much like Octavia that he felt the need to protect her.

Even if it meant dealing with her attitude.

“It’s no one’s fault but the Government. That’s the point of the protests. It’s always their fault” Miller pointed out, and Harper agreed. Bellamy kneeled next to a couple of bodies, one of them still holding a small gun in his hand. He took it from his cold, dead fingers and held it in his arms, aiming for the wall.

When he shot, a couple of birds left the partially destroyed building, flying away from the ruins. Bellamy grinned and showed them the gun.

“This, this wasn’t a peaceful protest. I don’t know what part you took in it, but this was meant to be a revolution, and the Government fucking got you” he said, hiding the gun in the pocket of his trousers.

“It was peaceful” Miller replied. “I helped organize it. Me and Griffin. It kind of got out of hands when Monty hacked the television system and announced it on TV.”

“People were starving for justice” Harper continued, taking off her jacket. There was a bad looking burn on her shoulder, and she made a face at the sight of it, but shoved Miller off when he ran to her. “They still are. Revolution is the only solution to end 10 years of a corrupt Government, poverty and pain” she said, and Bellamy raised an eyebrow.

They were just kids. They didn’t know anything about injustice. Injustice was to see his mother die next to him because it was her fault to get pregnant with Octavia. It was her fault to be assaulted by six Ministry’s employees and it was her fault to fight to raise their two children with no one’s help. It was her fault that she was caught stealing a couple of apples to give to a very sick Octavia. That was injustice.

Injustice was to live in a city where the kids had to go to the streets and protest and _die_ because their elders were too afraid to do anything.

“You know nothing” Bellamy murmured. Harper opened her mouth.

“Excuse you…” she began, but Bellamy was already next to her, shutting her up by gently touching the burn on her skin. She immediately screamed in pain, and Miller was already taking his own gun out of his pocket. Bellamy half smiled.

“So it was a pacific protest, you are trying to tell me” Bellamy said, not looking up to Miller while he examined Harper’s wound. She was stiff, breathing heavily, as if he was going to murder him at any moment. He was not. “We need to get this cleaned up” he just said, putting her jacket onto her arms.

“I had just taken it off”

“It will get dirty. And infected” Bellamy cut her off, and took Miller’s guns from his hands. “Take me to your safe place. If you organized this, you should have a safe place”

“I didn’t organize anything” Harper began. “Me and Nathan, we are old friends, I just attended it because…”

Bellamy groaned. She was insufferable.

“Harper, you wanted to come here! I told you…”

“Well,I didn’t know there were going to be bombs!”

“It was irresponsible, you weren’t even armed…”

“How about you shut up for a moment? I don’t care! This is bigger than your little Revolution Club, alright? This” he pointed up in the air “This is war. This is the beginning of a civil war and you guys are so fucking lost in your own world to even notice things are going to be bad”

“What do you…”Harper began, but Miller glared at her and she lowered her head. Bellamy ran his fingers through his hair, his heart beating faster than ever. It was war. They were at war and he was in the wrong place at the wrong moment, stuck with two teenagers and unable to find his sister.

“I need you to take me to your safe place. You mentioned you have a hacker, right?” Miller nodded and began walking, Harper at his feet. “I need to find my sister. If she still has her chip activated, we could…” he shut up and shook his head. One thing at a time.

First of all, he needed to take Harper to a medical post.

“Why do you know so much about bombs?” Miller asked. Bellamy didn’t know if he was just trying to chat or if he was actually interested, but either way, it was none of his business.

“I’m older than what I look like” he joked, simply. Harper attempted a smile and Bellamy looked at the bodies piled on the desert streets, not able to take the image of Maia of his head.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Bellamy Blake was screwed. He expected an old man to receive him, but instead there was this… girl. He had nothing against girls. In fact, he was all for them. But he expected someone more experienced leading the protests. Not Miller, an Asian guy with a brilliant brain and her. It was just that she was… not a leader.

She was much smaller than Harper. She literally was almost a midget. And she had that huge amount of blonde hair, all tangled in braids and knots, and soft blue eyes. She also had a glare that could kill men, that was true. And she was pissed at… well, at everybody. Bellamy didn’t talk while she screamed at every kid in the room and at the same time tried to clean up Harper’s wound.

“Good thing you got it covered up” she said gently, and Harper locked her eyes with Bellamy, his arms crossed and his back against the door of the little local that from the outside looked like a meat shop. He smirked at Harper and winked. The blonde girl looked up at him, finally noticing him and raised an eyebrow.

“He helped us” Harper murmured.

“Did you see anyone else?” the girl asked, while applying alcohol on the burn. Harper nodded.

“Maia. She didn’t make it”. Bellamy could see the girl tremble and grab the end of a chair with strength, her knuckles white. Harper swallowed. “He found her. I won’t say I’m sorry, but Wells…”Harper murmured. The girl coughed.

“Wells is nowhere to be found, Harper” she said, her voice shaky. Bellamy felt so small at that moment, even though he didn’t know what was going on. “What am I supposed to tell him? That his sister is… dead?”

“It is the truth” Bellamy said. The girl looked at him for the first time. She really looked at him, her blue eyes analyzing him.

“And you are…?”

“The guy who found her and held her until she was gone. Also, the guy thanks to who Harper is alive” Bellamy replied. The girl opened her mouth in a perfect O and Harper coughed to be noticed.

“He was right with everything. He told Nathan not to move. If we had left to the Park like we had planned, the third bomb would have smashed us” she quickly explained. “Also, he is a dick”

“Good to know” the girl smiled at Harper.

“But he is good. He looks for his sister. We could let him use the computer and…”

“We are not sharing our information with him! He might be a Government spy, Harper, for God’s sake” the other girl hissed.

Bellamy huffed and stood up from the wall, walking into the light. He could see the way the girl jerked up, her neck tense and her brows furrowed. She had a weird mole on top of her lip and a light scar on one side of her face, but she was pretty. Not beautiful like his own sister or Harper. Her face was delicate, as if she belonged in a castle made out of clouds. All in her gestures was kind, but her look was sharp and judging. Bellamy suddenly wanted to know everything about her. She took a step backwards and Bellamy wondered what made her so bossy. She was not a leader. She couldn’t be. _They are kids._

“I want to talk to Griffin” he said. Miller had said Griffin the other one organizing everything.

“I am” the girl said, a cocky smile on her lips. Bellamy raised an eyebrow. “Clarke Griffin” she said, proudly, and Bellamy opened his mouth, not believing it.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me” he swore under his breath. Harper touched his arm gently and he shoved it off, kicking one of the chairs. That was unbelievable. Harper then hit him on the shoulder, not hard enough to hurt him but it required the precise strength to make her whimper in pain.

Both Griffin and Bellamy looked at her, worried, and Bellamy was first in getting to the dressings and cleaning up her wound that had become a mess of blood and blisters. It had opened up, as expected. Bellamy carefully checked there was no dirt in there.

“I already checked her, you know, I’m a doctor”

“No, you are not, your mother is” Bellamy replied, coldly, not looking up to the blonde girl. It was unrealistic. That stupid club of kids was being led by the daughter of the most important doctors in Arkadia and one of the High Ministers. He heard Harper murmur something and finished covering the burn and gently putting her jacket back onto her shoulders.

It was then when Miller came into the room, followed by another teenager that just ran to Harper and hugged her tightly, making her hiss. Bellamy didn’t think twice and pushed him off her.

“Careful!” he shouted, and the kid looked at him, surprised. He looked back at Harper, then Miller, and back at him. Bellamy actually felt really observed by all of them.

“He’s the one” Miller murmured.

“I’m Monty Green” he greeted him, and then turned back to Harper. “Have you seen Jasper? He should be back by now, Wells too, everything has gone wrong…”

“We’ll get them” Griffin assured, but Monty wasn’t less worried. Miller then got closer to Bellamy and offered his hand, which he took. He trusted Miller. He was, actually, the only one of them all that seemed worthy of his trust. Not even that Green kid, with avid eyes, as if he was thinking all the time. He probably was.

When he looked back at Harper, her head was on Monty’s shoulder and his arm was on her waist. He didn’t pay much attention to them.

“I just need to know where my sister is. Then I’ll go, I don’t ever want to be related to you” he said, plain and frank and sincere. It was the truth.

“How do I know you’re not a spy?” Griffin snapped. Bellamy raised an eye.

“How do I know you’re not? As far as I know, Griffin people don’t get in trouble. They have everything solved in their life” he spitted back. “I had hoped this was good, but being led by a High Minister’s daughter is too much to handle. How is it that the little girl didn’t mean anything for you but you let this girl boss you around?”

“If you don’t know what you’re talking about, please shut up” Griffin replied, her voice icy. Bellamy snorted.

“I was a guard, you know. I guarded your mother for two and a half years and then I guarded Jaha and his son too. I know what your people do, I know how repulsive we poor people are to you, I do know. So please tell me you are not talking about Wells Jaha because this is just too unrealistic” he explained, with a groan.

“Well, this is awkward” Miller commented. Bellamy turned to him. “What? Nobody likes Jaha’s son, but he’s really helpful. Clarke is not her mother, by the way”. Griffin was still staring at him, and Bellamy held her gaze, not even close to feeling intimidated by her.

“I need to find my friend, you need to find your sister” Griffin stated.

“I do”

“Help me organize my people and I’ll help you get to her” she proposed. Bellamy raised an eyebrow and looked at Harper, Miller and Green. They were astonished, as him.

“Hell not”

“So you don’t believe in us”

“My sister believed in you and right now she’s lost and she might be dead” Bellamy pointed out. But Griffin had a serious look on her face. “You’re a bunch of kids!”

“I am not!” she took a step closer to him and Bellamy almost laughed. She was like a tiny lioness. However, he couldn’t look away from her. He took her arm with strength and pushed her back.

“You are a kid, princess. You fight because you might have common sense in that brain of yours and you might not accept your mother and her friend’s ideas. But you have seen nothing” he hissed. She shook her head, not giving up.

“Like you’ve seen much more! How old are you!”

“I’ve seen enough, okay? I want to find my sister and that’s all. I want to flee this place as soon as possible, before we all die in here”

“What are you talking about?” Green interrupted. Bellamy smiled. They didn’t know what that day had meant to history. They knew nothing about their past, nothing about how many times history repeated itself.

“That protest earlier today, those bombs, they mean war. We are at war. It won’t get dark by tomorrow night before it is announced on the media. You’re at war with your own mother, princess. Congratulations” he spitted. He looked for the door and went outside, back in the street. He didn’t care if he was being rude. God bless his sister, she was a stubborn one.

Bellamy kicked a rock and an immediate pain went through his leg. He swore out loud, in the middle of the street. It was full of dead bodies but nobody was picking them up. He thought of all the dead. They deserved better. They deserved to have a choice. Fuck his life; he had nothing at the moment.

“Bellamy!” he heard someone call him. When he turned around and saw that little annoying rich girl running to him, he couldn’t help but swear. _Why me?_

“Princess, I already said no. I’ll look for my sister on my own”

“We need you”

“You don’t even know me. Haven’t your parents taught you some rules about trusting strangers?” he replied, not looking down at her, as he continued on his way towards the Park.

Griffin found it hard to keep up to his pace, but she did it surprisingly well.

“My mother killed my father!” she breathed out, and that, that made Bellamy stop. He raised an eyebrow at her. “It’s true. The rumours were true. My mother knew my father didn’t agree with what the Government did, all that corruption, so she got him killed and almost got me killed so that I didn’t say anything. That’s why I ran away”

“Good story, Princess” Bellamy just said. She had a worried look on her bright eyes, and Bellamy couldn’t do anything but trust her. Damn it. It was going to be a terrible choice.

“I swear on my father, it’s the truth. I might not know what it’s like to be poor, but I want them all dead. As everyone here does”

“You are just kids. We are at war, princess. It’s not a bunch of peaceful protest anymore. Things are about to get serious…” he said, exasperated. He had fought against real rebels, following orders of the government. He knew too much.

“Then teach us!” she prayed, almost crying. “Maia has been killed by them, her own father, and Wells is nowhere to be found. Your sister has to be somewhere, too”

“My sister is my own responsibility” he spitted. Griffin crossed her arms and sighed, clearly nervous. Bellamy saw her bite her bottom lip, anxious.

“We have the spirit. My father had the spirit, too. Octavia has the spirit”. And with that, Bellamy opened his eyes, wide open. He took Griffin by the arms and pushed her onto the wall.

“Do you know where she is?”. She shook her head quickly, trying to get off his grip. Bellamy carefully let go, but she didn’t move from where she was, locked between the all and him. She was brave.

“She joined us a couple of weeks ago. Monty has already tracked her, but her chip seems to be off. There are two options: either she’s out of the city or she took her chip off” she said, her voice low. Bellamy ran his hand through his curls and swore under his breath.

“I need to find her”

“I am the leader of this thing, I love them all. People might trust each other, but most of them don’t give a fuck. However you… you care. Please, you have to care. You care about Harper, you cared about Maia, Nathan told me”

“You’re mad. You’re driving them to destruction”

“Then help us fly to success! We have the motivation and you know what to do. Why then did you leave the guard?” Griffin fought back. She was wild, an aura of strength around her that made it impossible to deny anything to her. She could ask for the moon and Bellamy would have found a way to bring it to her.

“I left because the Government is disgusting. But I can’t help a group of teenagers who don’t know if they got the guts to fight”

“We also have the brains. Raven Reyes is with us”. Bellamy frowned.

“She was your mother’s favourite” he remembered. Griffin nodded. “She’s a genius. What’s her plan?”

“Join the rebellion outside Arkadia and then assault the Government’s headquarters” she explained. “But we have to get through security, and we need you to teach us to fight. You still haven’t said yes”

“I won’t say anything until I know everything. This is not fucking _Mulan,_ Princess. Real shit is about to happen” he said, taking a strand of silky hair from her forehead and putting it behind her ear. It was a simple gesture, something he would have done for his sister without even thinking about it. Griffin swallowed.

“When we get to the Rebels, you can go whenever you want. We think Octavia is with them. Please, help us. Help me avenge my father”. She offered her hand, hesitant, and Bellamy rolled his eyes. He already knew that girl was going to be the death of him before he touched her hand.


	2. Ashes to ashes of our youth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Promise me you’ll think about it. Staying, after we get out of here.”
> 
> “I’ll think about it, Rae, but I’m pretty sure I won’t change my mind” he smiled, and Raven smirked.
> 
> "Oh, you will. Clarke is pretty convincing"
> 
> It turns out Raven was right and Bellamy was doomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is chapter 2! Please let me know how it was!

What surprised Bellamy the most wasn’t the fact that that Club (The Youth, they liked to call themselves) was actually so well organized he thought if they were older they could easily run a government. Griffin was smart and she had a gift when talking in public. She had that slow, steady and firm voice that could convince anyone and she was sharp, always noticing the smallest details. Raven Reyes, a pretty girl he had already met when guarding Doctor Griffin, was anything but what he expected her to be. Bellamy remembered her. She was a couple of years younger than him but older than any other member of the Youth, and she had that prodigious brain in which Bellamy was sure so many great ideas were hidden. She was sarcastic, and not the best talker, but she was a good kisser, as he remembered, and she smiled at him as if they were old friends. (They kind of were?)

Monty Green was another prodigious child and then there was Harper, and Miller, and Miller’s boyfriend. Bellamy wasn’t going to deny they were great kids, eager to learn. But he was a former soldier and it took him three years to finish his training. They needed to be soldiers to get through the Gates and they were going to get caught. It was a fact.

But the thing that surprised him the most was that he didn’t feel older. At all. And he was at least five years older than Griffin, if he had made the right math. But they were so mature it shocked him.

35 hours after Bellamy followed Griffin into the meat shop it was announced on TV that the city was in permanent lockdown, considering what had happened at the protests. Exhausting controls were being made and Bellamy knew the meat shop not being investigated was Griffin’s thing, but he didn’t say anything to her. They barely talked, to be honest. They just tended to argue about _everything._

Bellamy thought there was no one with the attitude of Octavia, but Harper had proved her wrong. And now Griffin was about to win the first prize.

“She is actually a great girl” Raven told him one day, on the beginning of his third week being locked in there with all the kids. She sat next to him on one empty table of the room they used to have their meetings.

Bellamy shrugged and looked down to the papers he was holding.

“Why are you here, Rae?” he asked instead. She moved her leg and winced, then sighed.

“I was sick of being used. I can make nuclear bombs, you know. Imagine if those bombs that killed Maia were my creation” she murmured. He hesitated but put an arm around her shoulders, and Bellamy felt her relax. “You can do so much good, Bellamy. Not only here, outside too. You are born to be a great leader”

“I am a soldier. I fight, I shoot, I survive. That’s all. When I find Octavia, I’m out of here”. Raven scoffed and turned to him, her big brown eyes lit with fire.

“Them being kids doesn’t mean they’re not worthy. Clarke has already talked to the Rebels, a couple of times. They’ve accepted to help us thanks to her. And when I see you screaming at her, and her screaming back, I just think that…” she swore under her breath and looked up to the ceiling. Bellamy frowned.

“What?”

“There is so much potential, Bellamy. Like, so much. If you just stopped complaining about each other’s presence for once, you would realize you are a great pair”

“You and I were a great pair” Bellamy said back, and Raven laughed. He couldn’t help but small and brush her hair with his lips.

“We were, that’s for sure. But... You could be so much more together"

They stood silent for a couple of minutes and then Raven was down, looking intensely at him. Bellamy felt intimidated, but he stood her glare the best way he could.

“Promise me you’ll think about it. Staying, after we get out of here.”

“I’ll think about it, Rae, but I’m pretty sure I won’t change my mind” he smiled, and Raven smirked.

"Oh, you will. Clarke is pretty convincing"

It turns out Raven was right and Bellamy was doomed.

First of all, Harper tended to get into trouble for literally every single thing she did. He saw her punch another kid when he tried to steal her jacket and he saw her shoot the glass of the meat shop when she got mad at Miller and Monty for not listening to her. She used to run away from the shop and into the Park, where everything was destroyed but at least the bodies were gone, and she kicked rocks and hit walls with her bare hands. Then she remembered she didn’t have a home, like everyone there, and she had to go back to the base. She always came back, and Bellamy sometimes found himself watching anxiously the door, waiting for her to arrive.

She was a wreck, and she was angry at everyone. She also argued against anyone that wouldn’t listen to him when he was explaining the easy mechanism of a rifle. Harper was keen to learn and she tried hard. Bellamy was proud of that kid. She was nice to him, but also ironic and funny and everything Bellamy saw in his sister. He tried to convince himself that feeling towards her was caused because of him missing O, but deep inside he knew Harper was growing in him, as well as the other kids.

It scared him, though.

And then ther was Clarke, always heplful and desperate, looking for answers, searching options that could get them out of there alive. She trusted him and she saw him as an equal and she argued with him. She was a fire and he was melting in her, fearing her when she got mad. She was unstoppable and she was ready to fight against anything and anybody so that the kids would be safe.

Bellamy was sure she would go to Hell and back if she had to, and she would die to protect any of them without thinking. But he wanted to make sure that didn't happen, and that's why he was there. To help her find a life. With or without him in it.

“It has to be tomorrow” he announced one morning as good morning, storming into the room he practically shared with Clarke, full of maps and notes and blackboards full of possible routes and outcomes of their mission. He had begun calling her Clarke when she had begun to think of her as a very different person from her mother. She was the spirit of justice and vengeance and greatness. And right at that moment she was waking up with a shout from the couch where she had probably fell asleep. She rubbed her eyes and yawned before looking at him with an arched eyebrow.

“You can’t be serious, it’s too soon” she said, her own greeting, lazily walking to him and looking at the cup of coffee he was holding. Bellamy offered it to her, as he knew she was nothing without caffeine. Bellamy nodded, sitting in front of the packed table and putting the majority of the papers on the left side of it. It was early in the morning, just a couple of sunrays peeking through the window.

“How long are the Walkers going to accept your money, Princess?” She opened her mouth but he closed his eyes, tired. “Don’t even try to deny it. They are observing us. We need to get out of here as soon as possible, and it’s already late. The kids are nervous”

“They are not ready”

“They will never be ready! They are teenagers, they are scared and they want to feel safe! They need to get to the rebels!” he roared back, getting up. She didn’t back up, though. She was as wild as him; she had that temper people always complained about him. Besides, she threw the best tantrums. Bellamy thought about the words of Raven. _We are not a pair._

“I am not sending them to die” she groaned, her eyes cold as ice. He swore and kicked the chair, suddenly mad at everything.

“If you weren’t so stubborn…!” he began, but Clarke hit the table with her fist, a hard noise that made him wince.

“Their deaths, they are on me” she hissed. “I’ve lost six of them, your sister among them. One of them is the son of the future Mayor and we don’t know if he’s with the Rebels or if he’s in hell. We don’t know anything and Raven has been trying for weeks!”

“I already know that”

“I talked to him, yesterday night. Jaha” she finally admitted, and Bellamy’s heart began pumping with strength. What the hell was she talking about? “Please, let me talk. He wants us to surrender. It’s bad, you were right. People want to fight more than ever, they want to fight for all the deaths and the Conclave thinks it’s our fault that they were obliged to use the bombs” she explained, her voice barely a whisper. Bellamy kneeled next to her, his mind already going through the worst outcomes of that situation.

“This is fucked up. You should have told me”

“It didn’t matter at the moment because I thought we still had time. Jaha, he still trusts me. He thinks Wells is with me, so that’s the only reason he’s letting us live. If he found out Wells is nowhere to be found...”

“We will be bombed within days” Bellamy finished for her. Clarke nodded, silently, and Bellamy blinked twice. “So the Government doesn’t have them, at least we know that” he said. She nodded again.

“But maybe they are dead, Bellamy. What if the Rebels don’t have them?”

“You already said the Rebels will accept you. They will tell you.”

“Not anymore” she whispered again, and Bellamy rolled his eyes.

“Oh, fuck me. What have you done, Princess?”

“They think we are a danger”

“You’re kids” he pointed out, and she shot him a hateful glare.

“Not the Youth. Me. And you”

“They know nothing about me” he said, defending himself.

“Bellamy, it is Arkadia. Everyone knows everything. They know you’re a great trainer and they know you are good, and you lead the kids. You are danger”

“I don’t lead anyone!”

“I’m stuck in here as well as you, and I hate this! I don’t even want power, I just want my people out of the city and safe, but the Rebels think otherwise!”

“Your people? Clarke, they are not your children”

“I made them fight, I made them trust you. It was me, all the time. And now it is you, too”

“What… what are we going to do?”

“I don’t know. They will want me to accept their rules; they don’t want to risk their position”

“They are a danger. They are armed, and they have faith. The Rebels are right in not trusting us, Princess. Damn it, this is all wrong!”

It was obvious. If the rebels had Wells and Octavia, and they didn’t get along, there was no way in Earth he was going to get her back. It was basically impossible. But if they were lost, it was even worse. He didn’t know what to think. Clarke put her hand on his shoulder, briefly.

“We will find Octavia, I promise. It’s just that our actions are very limited” she said, her voice harsh, as if she was about to cry. Bellamy looked up to catch her look, all broken and disappointed and sad. Something moved in him, like a knot in his stomach.

“I’m sorry” she said, then, and he arched an eyebrow.

“It is not your fault”

“Well, I made you join us”

“It is not your fault, princess” he insisted, taking her hand. He didn’t know why he did it, but it felt good to have her tiny hand in between his big, rusty ones. Bellamy felt so weird right at that moment, Clarke crying in silence next to him, his hands around her back, awkwardly. However, it was nice to have her so close, as if he was going to protect her from the Rebels, the Government and hell itself.

Because he was going to. No matter what.

 

Bellamy decided to risk his life and try to get through the Gates by himself the morning he was walking around the guards and he saw them shoot a woman that was attempting to sneak outside. They didn’t move a finger but to get their guns and the moment she started running towards the electrified wall she was dead. She didn’t even have time to explain herself. Bellamy heard her body crash against the floor and he imagined Clarke’s body next to the woman’s. That just did it. Not even having trained for eight years would help the group escape Arkadia, the 100 of them.

Besides, they weren’t even sure they were going to be accepted outside. He couldn’t risk that, but he couldn’t stay there forever without knowing where his sister was. So he made his choice on his way to the Base, and he didn’t tell anyone. Bellamy just kept training them, going through endless plans with Clarke and shutting off the light when she fell asleep on the table while talking with him.

But his mind was already thinking about a possibility of success, a perfect plan to help him get out of there.

Two days later he saw a video of a Rebel cutting a couple’s head off, out of the confusion of thinking they were arkadians. Rebels thought they were part of the Youth and were there to confront them and maybe spy on them; that’s what the Rebel told the Chief when she got there. The couple were mere travelers, and the woman was carrying their unborn son when the Rebel sliced her throat.

Bellamy shouldn’t have seen it, but he was just scrolling around the videos the cameras that Monty and Harper had hacked had taped during the day. He didn’t mean to see it. In that moment he realized neither the inside nor the outside of Arkadia were safe for the kids, and the only choice he had was to run by himself and face the Rebels. If they were going to kill him, so be it, but an only man would make a better impression than a group of armed kids.

No choice seemed right. However, the only choice that seemed acceptable enough was the one that involved risking his life against two groups of people that would rather have him dead.

“So you’re leaving”. He turned to the door as Harper stormed into the room he was reading at. She looked pissed, but Bellamy tried to keep a blank face, no expression on it.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” he said, switching his eyes to the papers he was reading, explaining the mechanism of the mines spread all around the city. Even if he got out of the controls, the mines would kill him within seconds, if he wasn’t smart enough.

“You can fool everyone, but certainly not me, and not Clarke” she spitted, and Bellamy threw the pen he was holding away, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.

“You’re such a coward! You let all of us trust you and then you decide to leave on your own and let us here to die!” she continued screaming.

“As I said, I don’t know…” Bellamy began explaining; rolling his eyes, but the girl was out of control.

“Every single time you go down to the basement to teach us to shoot you steal a couple of bullets, and you have been keeping your bread instead of eating it”

“Harper…”

“It is true, isn’t it? You are just leaving, on your own, as you’ve planned to do since the beginning!” she continued screaming, and Bellamy had had enough of the screams. So he got up and went straight to the door, opening it.

“Get out, and come back when you are ready to stop bitching around” he groaned, his hand on his hips. Harper opened her mouth and answer in the best way possible. She ran towards him and began punching all his soft spots, with strength and determination, making him groan in pain and fall to the floor.

“Will you fucking stop?!” he roared, grabbing her hand. She then began kicking around in the air, screaming and biting his wrists, until Bellamy immobilized her by putting all his weight on her, both lying on the floor, panting. He looked into Harper’s eyes and all he saw was fury, deception, and madness. She swore out loud.

“Let me explain myself” he murmured. She tried to move, but he wasn’t 6 feet tall for no reason at all. Even though she made it hard to keep her still, that was a fact, he finally managed to make her stop moving around. “Come on, Harper, let me explain”

“Get off me” she groaned back.

“I am not leaving to abandon you” he began, but Harper was already talking and interrupting him and making things awfully hard.

“Like Hell you aren’t! You are just using all the information we have! You never intended to get us through the Gates!” she kept accusing him.

“I am planning to get you all to safety, and that might involve going alone!” he screamed, and Harper opened her eyes, no words coming out of her mouth. At least he had shut her up. Bellamy dubiously let go of her hands and she dragged herself to the other side of the room, still with a surprised expression on her face.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean the Rebels think we are a danger, and the Government knows where we are. If I can get Wells we might have an option to negotiate, but at the same time the Rebels probably want my head for training a bunch of unafraid kids”

“Why are you planning to go right to them, then?”

“Because if I’m right, and the rebels have my sister as well, then they know I am not a threat to them. I will have to do anything they want me to do, and in return I’ll get both of them and fix this situation” he finally breathed out, and Harper ran to him, her arms on his neck, hugging him fiercely.

“Fuck you, Bellamy, for even considering it” she murmured. “We are not letting you go anywhere, not with that stupid plan of yours”

“But you are”

“No way in Hell”

“Harper, you are, and you are not telling Clarke anything about this conversation. I need to go by myself” he said, looking at her. Harper shook her head.

“It is a suicide, you fool!”

“I am way more prepared than any of you, do you not trust me?” he joked, but Harper’s glare did not accept jokes to enlighten the mood. She crossed her arms and sighed.

“I am coming with you”. He laughed and shook his head.

“Yeah, right. Guess what, you’re not. Haven’t you heard anything? It is too dangerous”

“What is too dangerous?” another voice asked. Bellamy turned around to see Miller entering the room, frowning, and Harper gasped, getting up and straightening her shirt.

“Bellamy’s stupid plan to go through the gates” she said, quickly, as Bellamy rolled his eyes, punching the wall.

“Harper!”

“What are you talking about, mate? We are not ready yet” Miller looked at him, both surprised and confused.

“Oh, he is going by himself” she continued.

“Oh, no, we’re going with you”

“No”

“I already told him that…”

“Then let us help you somewhat…”

“I said no!” Bellamy then roared, and Harper literally backed off. Bellamy knew he had screamed, maybe too much, but he didn’t care at the moment.

He just needed to get out of there, help get them a place where they could live without the constant fear of being bombed, where they could create a great civilization with no robbery, no hypocrisy. However, Nathan’s hurt face told him that was a stupid idea.

“You are going to regret this. When Clarke finds out…” he began, and Bellamy rolled his eyes, he wasn’t afraid of what Clarke would think. He was, let’s be honest, but just of what she would think of him, not of his idea. He didn’t want her to know he was a coward. He wanted to save her. He wanted to save all of them and he was the only good choice they had.

“She won’t until I am gone” he said, convinced of his plan. That night, he needed to leave. There was no way they were going to survive another week and controls were less extract on weekends. Jaha was going to find out sooner than later and then it was going to be a massacre. Harper surprised him hugging him tightly, sobbing in an unnecessary way that broke his heart. Damn it. He was screwed.

“I hate you, you know. You’re so reckless” she murmured against Bellamy’s chest. Miller nodded, lying against the wall.

“If you’re really doing it, you need to take a walkie and let us know every movement you make” he said, convinced. Bellamy laughed and sat down again at the table.

“You realize I’m 23 years old, right? I don’t need to me monitored. I can do this”

“Still. Clarke will want to know”

“Okay, let me be clear. Clarke can’t know anything. She can’t know where I’m going, what I’m doing. So it will be better if she thinks I left” he said. He was doing it for her.

“And Raven?”

“She knows” he said, simply. Of course she knew. He could do nothing without Raven. She was the genius there, the one he trusted the most.

If Clarke knew, she would follow him. And he didn’t want her to. It was too dangerous and she was too precious for the group to be lost in a mission that was most likely to end up badly.

However, that night, after he hid the food and the bullets in his backpack and got ready to leave in silence, she was already at the door, her hair tied up in a tight ponytail, her own gun hid in her jacket, a fierce look on her face. Bellamy could be surprised but, deep inside him, he knew that was going to happen. And he was mad.

“Was it Harper?” he groaned, crossing his arms. She smirked.

“Raven, in fact. You’re an idiot” she said, plain and simple as she was.

"Don't do it"

"I'm not leaving you alone, not now. If you want to die, fine, but we'll die together"she replied, raising her voice.

"Maybe I'm running off and this is all a lie"

"Then we'll run off. We both know you can't do it, and we both know we need each other if we want to do this right"

"Privileged princess using her charms"

"Asshole not being able to shut his mouth" she shot back, and Bellamy smiled. There she was, arguing with him as she always did, as if it was the only thing they could do. Bellamy remembered Raven's words.

_They could be so much more._

For once, he saw it, he saw  _her_ and  _him_ as a  _them,_ leading the kids into freedom.

He swore under his breath and took a step closer to her, as he took her face in his hands. Bellamy was not controlling his actions, but he was about to go into Hell, and she had decided to join him. Her breath was hot agains his neck and he shivered.

“In other circumstances I would kiss you” he whispered against her face. Clarke nodded and swallowed, her eyes closed.

“In other circumstances I would accept your kiss” she said back, and he smiled. That was all there was going to be between them, and that was all that needed to be. It might sound like a promise, but Bellamy knew better. They had busy lives, complicated situations, and they would never have each other. In other circumstances they could own the Sun. But at that moment, they only had revolution. He opened the door and she followed; her hand between his.


	3. Left outside alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If I had let you go alone you would have probably managed to do it. I was too slow” she murmured back, and he attempted to caress her hair with a bloody hand.
> 
> “I’m very glad you’re here” he replied, softly, and he felt her smile against his chest.
> 
> “Yeah, me too. Even if we are never finding Wells or your sister”
> 
> “I know”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! :)

They didn’t cross the gates. There was no chance in Earth they could have, and Bellamy knew it, but, _fuck._ He had hope. A bullet was shot aiming for his head but instead it barely touched his ear and it was bleeding too fast.

Clarke had tried to negotiate, using her mother’s spot in the Government to bargain but, as Bellamy had already guessed, it was useless and they were locked in a tiny dirty cell, all their things taken away from them. Clarke had kicked, she had yelled and swore and she had tried to push the guards. Then they had taken their guns out and Clarke had kept on being stupid, so it was technically her fault that he was shot.

“Damn it, damn it, damn it…” she murmured when the door was closed and they were confined to darkness. There was a little light and the cell was not too big, so there was not much that needed to be lit up.

Bellamy groaned and just sat on the floor, his hand holding his ear, the top of it cut off. He expected the bleeding to stop before Clarke noticed but, as everything that day, it didn’t go the way it was planned, and, as soon as the girl turned around to face him, she took her hands to her mouth and gasped horror in her eyes.

“I’m fine” Bellamy began explaining, but she was already crouching next to him and taken his hand in hers, examining the wound. It must have been a stupid hole made by the bullet but it was threatening to bleed him dry. She bit her bottom lip, all worried and sad and guilty, as she took off her jacket, hoping to find something to put pressure with on the wound. Of course there was nothing. And of course, with her face barely exposed to the light, her hair all messy and tangled and barely hanging on the ponytail, Clarke was more beautiful than ever. He hid a smile and wondered what would feel like it he just pressed his lips against hers.

“I have nothing to stop it” she whined, with a moan. She was putting the right amount of pressure with her own hands on the wound and Bellamy knew, _hoped,_ the wound would cauterize soon enough so that he didn’t bleed out because of a fucking bullet-hole in his fucking ear.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, it doesn’t hurt, I’m not bleeding out” he assured her, but Clarke still looked at him as if he was terminal. He realized then her hands were full of his blood and something moved in his stomach. He swallowed. She noticed it too and shrugged, sitting next to him, maybe too close.

 _Okay._ There were about to be executed and Bellamy was worrying because Clarke’s head was on his shoulder and her hands were gripping his t-shirt.

“It is my fault” he whispered into the dark. Clarke made a little noise.

“If I had let you go alone you would have probably managed to do it. I was too slow” she murmured back, and he attempted to caress her hair with a bloody hand.

“I’m very glad you’re here” he replied, softly, and he felt her smile against his chest.

“Yeah, me too. Even if we are never finding Wells or your sister”

“I know”

“I’m sorry” she said, and he knew she really meant it. Bellamy pressed a kiss to her forehead. It was his entire fucking fault and he was not supposed to feel this way. He hoped, he expected his plan to turn out right and now they were both locked in, Clarke was in danger and the kids were alone. He felt miserable.

The door was opened and someone came in. it was so dark that Bellamy couldn’t see a thing, but the figure crouched in front of him, taking his hood off hesitantly. When his face was shown, Bellamy gasped and Clarke furrowed her eyebrows, not getting a thing. But Bellamy could not look away, because that was Octavia’s beautiful, innocent face, her eyes sharp and dark, her eyebrows raised. And she was wearing a guard’s uniform as if it was her own.

“O…” he murmured, shooking his head. Octavia just took his chin in her long, cold hands, and made him lift it, as if she hadn’t known it yet.

“So it’s true. You’re with the Rebels” she growled, and Bellamy swore he had never heard Octavia talk like that, with so much hate in her voice.

“What have they done to you?” he spit back. He felt Clarke next to him, silent, observing everything around them. Octavia looked older, her hair tied up and her face pale, as if she hadn’t had enough sleep for days. She looked nothing like his sister, and Bellamy wanted his sister back.

The way she was standing next to him, so polite and mature, like a soldier, that was his way of dealing with things. Not hers. What had they done to her? Why was he not quick enough to rescue her? Fuck his life.

“What have they done to you?” he repeated. She cringed.

“What about you? Why are you with her? You know who she is” Octavia murmured. He looked back at Clarke.

“She is nothing like her mother. It’s her mother who controls all this”

“You’re wrong. No one in here is loyal to Griffin or Jaha. They are only looking for his son so that they can use it against the Government”

Bellamy felt Clarke get up and try to kick Octavia, but she moved faster, and Clarke gasped when Octavia raised a riffle to her face. Bellamy swallowed hard.

“Put the gun down, O. You’re not a killer”

“Why did you want to contact the Rebels?” Octavia said, instead, not looking away from Clarke’s face. She was fierce, like a fire, and Bellamy was afraid.

“I thought they had you” he admitted. “O, put the riffle down right now. I thought you had run away after the bombs, I never expected the Guard to find you…”

“I ran into them” she replied, her voice low. “I ran into them and they held me prisoner for weeks until I told them who I was and who you were and then they said you were a traitor, even after having been a soldier, after all we’ve been through…”

“Are you listening to yourself right now?” Clarke interrupted, taking a step closer to Octavia, the riffle held against her ribcage.

“Shut up”

“I know who you are; you were one of the last ones to join us. We hacked your chip. You took it off” she accused her, and Octavia grinned. Of course she had, reckless of her. “You believed in me when you decided to join the Youth. What has changed?”

“Maybe the fact that you lead them”.

Bellamy snorted. She thought just like him.

“O, she is good. She means…”

“I don’t care if she means well, Bell! She is the reason the city is on lockdown” Octavia roared, and a couple of guards came into the cell, worried because of the screams. “I said clearly that I wanted to be alone with them” she murmured, fury in her voice.

The door closed behind them and Bellamy was left to the darkness again. It was then, when Octavia was sure nobody was listening, when she threw the riffle to the floor and threw herself onto Bellamy’s arms.

Bellamy held her tightly against her chest, closing his eyes, breathing her familiar smell. That was her, it was her, it was O and she was okay. When she pulled back, she looked Clarke upside down but just raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, I have just a few more minutes” she whispered. “Griffin controls everything and now thanks to your girl’s stupidity, she knows where you are. She wants her daughter back. The Rebels are not to be trusted, Bell, I already tried. The Guard is loyal to the Revolution, as the Youth, but they won’t dare to defy the Government, not yet” she spoke quickly and low, her voice barely a whisper.

“What about Wells?” Clarke interrupted. “Jaha thinks we have him and that’s the only thing holding him back from bombing the Butchery…”

“Wells is dead”

Bellamy could see Clarke’s world disappear in a second. Immediately he was at her side, frozen, not knowing what to do to calm her, to assure her she wasn’t alone, to comfort her. He had no idea what to do but he knew if she had asked him to kill the whole population he would have. He would run straight to Hell and back if she had asked in that moment, but Bellamy just stood there, Clarke’s eyes lost looking somewhere in the wall. He looked into Octavia’s eyes, who stood there, stronger than ever. The things she had agreed to do in order to survive… he didn’t want to know.

“Jaha can’t know” Bellamy whispered.

“The Rebels know. They want a bargain with the Government. The Youth is alone. It will be a massacre if we don’t do anything soon”

“But… what?” Bellamy murmured, looking at Clarke. She had tears in her eyes, as if she was fighting with all her strength not to cry and she was losing. But she swallowed and took Bellamy’s warm hand, tight and cold and sure. She was strong, she was all he needed to survive and she was the one who had put him in that situation.

She was also the one that was going to fight through her mother and back to get them out of there. She was the leader they all needed.

“I need to talk to my mother” she said.

“She will lock you up for the rest of her life” Octavia said, shaking her head. Clarke smiled and took the riffle from the floor.

“She will listen to what I have to say or else she will see her own daughter killing herself”

“She is ruthless”

“I know my fucking mom, Bellamy” Clarke spat. “She controls Jaha, she is the real leader and she is the one who’s dealing with the Rebels from outside. I have to be the one who talks to her”

“She is coming” Octavia announced. Clarke nodded and Bellamy stood between the two girls.

“There’s no way in Hell I’m letting her go into that trap. Her mother will kill her, O, you know it. I’ve told you many times how these people work…”

“Do you want to save your kids or not?” Clarke asked, pushing him aside.

“They’re not my…”

“They are mine. They are my people, and I owe this to them. So if I have to sacrifice myself, I will”. She nodded to Octavia, again, and O opened the door of the tiny cell, letting know to the guards that the prisoner was ready to be taken. Bellamy started to roar, moving towards her, trying to stop her. As if she didn’t know her mother. He knew her, he knew Griffin and he knew she would kill Clarke, it didn’t matter if she was her daughter or not.

Octavia’s gun stopped him and he pledged for her salvation, in silence, observing her blonde hair disappear. Another guard took him by the arm and Bellay couldn’t control himself. His elbow hit the guard’s nose and after two simple kicks, he was laying on the floor, as three other guards approached the cell.

But Bellamy could only think of Clarke, and how she had disappeared and he couldn’t do anything but follow her, wherever she went, to Hell and back.

“Bell, stay still!” Octavia screamed, but Bellamy had a mission. He couldn’t let Clarke be in danger, not after all she had done. It was his fault she was there, it was his fault her own mother was going to kill her.

He grasped the riffle from Octavia’s hands and shot the three guards with three movements, adrenaline rushing through his body. He had never felt more alive, he had never felt more powerful. It was the battle that awakened him, the fear to be killed, the pride when you killed. Bellamy took Octavia’s arm and stood outside of the cell, the light blinding him for a second. He looked both sides, large corridors that would take them to either Clarke or more guards, not warned about their position and their aim.

“You’re going to get us both killed” Octavia hissed, and Bellamy swore under his breath. “You don’t get it, do you? She has everything planned, she knew.”

Bellamy looked down at her, astonished. What did that mean? Didn’t she come here to help him? All of a sudden everything seemed to fit. She never wanted to help him out. Her only aim was to get to her mother; she had everything organized with Raven, who knows who guards around them already knew.

“So you knew where I was”

“Of course I did” Octavia murmured. Bellamy had never felt so betrayed in his life. He had spent weeks helping those kids out so that he could find his sister. He thought she was out there, dying, starving, hurt. And she knew all the time.

“Didn’t you think it would be a detail if you let us know where the hell you were?” Bellamy roared, turning left. Octavia followed quickly enough so that no one noticed them. He was furious, he was mad at them for not telling them, he was as angry as he’d never been.

“Bell, Bell!”

“Did Clarke know? Oh, who am I kidding, of course she knew!” he growled. Octavia looked at him, arching an eyebrow.

“She didn’t know. I couldn’t risk it”

“What…?” Bellamy began, but then he felt a sting on his neck and he turned around, his gun already pointing at the guards that were approaching them. Octavia hissed and ran towards them, as if she knew how to fight.

She didn’t.

She fell like a fly after being hit by a guard, whimpering, and then Bellamy shot. He wasn’t the greatest with a rifle, but both guards fell next to Octavia, dead. Octavia got up slowly, her face red and blood dripping down one side, her eyebrow broken. However, she looked at him with fire in her eyes.

“Next time you decide to scream your insecurities, please don’t” she grumbled, before stretching her arms and kicking him in the arm. He nodded and swallowed hard. “I’m serious, Bell. I know that girl means the world to you but she knows what she is doing”

“ _You_ mean the world to me” Bellamy corrected her, even though he knew it was impossible to lie in that moment. Octavia just nodded and kept going through the corridors, towards Clarke.

* * *

 

 

Clarke was afraid. She was hand-cuffed and her hair was a mess, which shouldn’t bother her at any moment of her life, but it did now because she was about to meet her mother. Her mother, who had denied the revolution and also had denied her being her daughter when she ran away with the Youth.

Abby Griffin was nothing like the mother Clarke always wanted to have, and she was probably not going to change in that moment of their lives.

Which was the reason why Clarke finally admitted to herself that her plan, (her wonderful plan she and Raven had designed, all of it in total secret, looking for the best opportunity to escape the Youth without telling them she was sacrificing for them) was a total failure.

She suspected it, but when she saw her mother enter the room and the guards leaving them two alone, she knew. She was sure about it. Damn it.

“Finally” Abby just said. She looked the same as how Clarke remembered her. A sharp face, big eyes and a fierce beauty and pride in her movements that Clarke had, of course, inherited. She hadn’t inherited her corruption, though.

“So should I call you Doctor Griffin or Chancellor?” Clarke snapped as a salute, but Abby barely flinched, sitting on the table in front of Clarke. She was wearing her Doctor’s uniform, but Clarke could look beyond that.

“Mom would be nice”

“You stopped being my mom the moment you decided to pursue that stupid career in politics” Clarke replied, and Abby raised an eyebrow.

“What are you here for, Clarke?”

“To negotiate” she said. “I want the Youth to be safe as they leave Arkadia. I don’t know where they will go but I don’t want them outside these walls”

“That is not happening, honey…”

“Don’t. Don’t _honey_ me” Clarke almost screamed, but breathed a couple of times before snapping again. “I’m serious. Half he Guard is with me. At this moment two of my people are inside, looking for them and convincing them to raise their weapons against you”

“You know that’s not going to happen”

“Try us. Give them two minutes” Clarke smirked, pretending to be sure of what she was saying and praying to whatever God there was Octavia was truly on her way to the Guards’ gym, where she could put her plan into action.

“I won’t give you anything. You either surrender or you die. I don’t care that you’re my daughter, Clarke.”

“I thought all you wanted was to have me back” Clarke replied, and Abby lifted her head, surprised for the first time.

“What…?”

“I will stop Octavia if you let them leave. 100 kids against your daughter back home. That’s what I’m offering”

“So you’re eager to come back home, live with me as I gain more and more power in my, what did you call it?, corrupt way to leadership, and not do anything about it?”

Clarke flinched. She hated her, she hated her. She could not survive one day inside that bunker she once called home, not after having been free, not after knowing there is hope outside, not after having met Bellamy Blake. But she nodded.

“Where are those kids going? You know the Rebels only speak to me”

“But Jaha doesn’t” Clarke murmured, and Abby frowned, crossing her arms. Clarke tried to move her hands, but the cuffs were too tight on her wrist.

“Jaha is no one here, Clarke. Jaha has done many mistakes and I’m here to make things right for the first time”

“Like bombing kids” Clarke spat, furious. Abby didn’t move a muscle. “Do you know how many deaths were that day? Too many, and all of them are because of you. I don’t know how you sleep at night”

“I did what I had to do”

“Wells is dead” Clarke finally said. “I don’t know what the Rebels are trying to bargain with you, but they’re lying, they want your power. We don’t”

“You can’t be…”

“Oh, I am. My best friend is dead, and so is his sister. How will Jaha react to that?”

“You won’t tell him”

“I thought you said he didn’t have any power left”

“Clarke….”

“Does he even know that it was you who sent the bombs?” Clarke asked, her voice high-pitched. Abby winced and Clarke had her answer. “Then it’s even better for me. You choose, mom, I can have you destroyed by the Guard, Jaha or myself. Or you can free them”

Abby coughed and got closer to her, but Clarke didn’t even try to move a muscle. She was all rage, all pain, and all fury. There was nothing else in her. She had played her cards and she had found out she was incredibly good at it. Now it was time to wait.

“I’m offering this one last time. The kids or me. You decide, mom. I will shut up, but touch one of them and I will turn everything against you, I won’t doubt. I have so many people against you that will willingly die for my cause, you’d be killed within seconds” Clarke said, looking into her mother’s eyes.

It was the longest silence Clarke hadd ever been dragged into, but when Abby opened her mouth, Clarke felt like she could breathe again.

“I guess it’s settled, then” Abby finally said after a couple of minutes. “Guards! Come here and release my daughter. She is coming home”

 

* * *

 

 

Octavia’s plan was not to get to Clarke. It was to get to the Guard, at least to the place where there could be a reasonable amount of guards that would listen to her. That was the canteen, of course. Bellamy sighed and crossed his arms as Octavia climbed onto one table to start one of her revolutionary speeches she had heard on the radio.

It was not enough. Bellamy knew. He fucking knew this was not important. He needed to get to Clarke. He had to get to her before having her killed.

“And right now our leader is up there, locked by her own mother who…” Octavia continues, rough voice and too high-pitched to be taken seriously, even though she is. They are listening to her. That little teenage girl, too skinny to be well-fed was making them listen to her. Bellamy half-smiled until one of the guards got up and made a stupid comment towards Octavia’s butt.

It all happened too fast. Bellamy’s rifle was already pointing at him but another guard had been faster than him, stronger than him, and the son of a bitch, before Bellamy could blink twice, had his nose broken and was swearing out loud.

Octavia just smiled, suddenly shy, and the guard approached her, a serious look on his face.

“My name is Lincoln, and my unit will follow” he simply said, his voice low and husky. Bellamy nodded at him when their eyes found each other.

“It’s not enough” he said, and Octavia shot him a glare, furious.

“Bellamy, it’s more than what…” she began. But he climbed the table, next to her, and looked at the packed room before clearing his voice and lowering her head to Octavia’s ear.

“A unit will not be enough” he murmured. “I am Bellamy Blake of the Guard of Arkadia” he said out loud, his statement followed by murmurs. He was well-known when he was inside. Only the best guarded the Ministers, and he had guarded Griffin and even Jaha.

Before he left, he was the fucking best.

“You fled” he heard someone accuse him, and Bellamy snorted.

“Yes, I left because I was living in a lie. We serve, we don’t ask questions. Those are our rules. Until you ask questions and you find out things you’d be better off not knowing, I will assure you. We…” he raised his voice. “We are being managed by a doctor who just aims for power, she wants nothing but control. She bombed kids not many months ago and she will get away with it”

“Bell…” Octavia began, but Bellamy just let his rage pump his own heart.

“We are not puppets! Not anymore, not ever! We could fight for what is right and we could win because we are more powerful than what the Chancellor makes us think! We sustain them, we protect them so that they can let out families unprotected. Is this the kind of Guard we want for Arkadia? Did we really make our vows for this government?”

“Who is fit to rule, then?” another guard asked. Bellamy just smiled.

“No one is. We get to decide the best qualified now, but we get freedom to choose. That’s the whole point. It is about choice. We’ve never had a choice. I didn’t have a choice. I could abandon the Guard and promise to never admit that I had overheard Griffin and Jaha talk about designing a virus to reduce population and have the crowd depend on them for medicine. Or I could see my sister die in front of me. Not much of a choice, is it?”.

Octavia swore under her breath next to him.

“The flu that… oh my God, two years ago…” she murmured.

“We get to choose now. You get to choose to stand for what is right or to be a coward, to keep on protecting those who want you dead, who think you’re less than a bug” he said, finishing his sentence in a whisper.

It was common agreement. Everyone followed, and Bellamy wondered whether he had acted right or not. Because he was leading them to war.

War against injustice.

 

 

When Bellamy, Lincoln, Octavia and one of Lincoln’s soldiers stormed into the Captain’s office, Bellamy really thought it was going to be over then. He really thought about it, about leaving Arkadia with his sister, happy with his actions for once.

It wasn’t that easy at all. First of all, because he didn’t find Kane. There she was, Abby Griffin, as dangerous as he’d remembered her, sitting on the table with her arms crossed and a high ponytail. She looked too calmed to know the Guard had taken over the Gates.

Or maybe she already knew.

“I thought we were at good terms when you left, Blake” she said as a salute, and Bellamy felt Octavia stiffen besides him. He growled.

“We are here for your daughter. That is all” he managed to say.

“Are you?”

“We are” Octavia said. “I know you’ve taken her. We want her and we want or people out of Arkadia, that’s all” she said, her gun in her hands, shaking uncontrollably. Abby Griffin just raised an eyebrow.

“My daughter and I have come to different terms, you know. She stays here with me. I let the Youth go”. Bellamy froze. Of course Clarke would have done it. She was so stupid, so fucking stupid. Of course she had risked, given up her freedom for them. Fuck.

“We want to see her” Octavia continued.

“That’s not in our agreement”Abby said, calm, and Bellamy just lost it. He stormed across the room, kicked the table aside and pointed his rifle at Abby’s heart.

“Where. The. Fuck. Is. She.” he growled, his voice low, sharp and furious. His heart was beating faster than ever. If she had hurt Clarke, she was dead. It didn’t matter if she was a Doctor or not a Chancellor or not. She was dead.

Octavia was screaming and Lincoln was already fighting Abby’s bodyguards, but Bellamy only had eyes for Doctor Griffin, his eyes asking the same question over and over again. He charged his rifle with a click and aimed for her heart.

He was done.

With the lies.

With the corruption.

With the pain.

With the death. He remembered the little girl’s eyes, blank, no life in them, as he held her that day at the Protest. He knew in that moment he was going to die for Revolution, he just didn’t want to admit it. Or maybe he was dying for Clarke Griffin, because she was the real face of revolution.

It seemed like a pretty good death. So when Abigail Griffin shot him in the neck with what looked like a syringe, itchy and painful, he wasn’t worried at all.

He just tried to keep his eyes open, an impossible mission, and fell to the ground, noises around him, voices screaming that belonged to no one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it for now! Sorry for the intrigue folks, hope you've liked it

**Author's Note:**

> First Bellarke AU ever! I hope you like this first chapter, and I know, I know, it doesn't have a lot of actual Bellarke but I wanted to introduce the majority of the characters properly. We will get there, guys! (Besides, we have waited for 4 seasons to have canon Bellarke, so we are all used to waiting)  
> I really hope you enjoy this first chapter! This story will have just three chapters, but they will be long ones! It's about to go wild next chapter, I am so excited!  
> Also, I got this idea when I watched Les Miserables for the 11th time a couple of weeks ago and it turned out to have nothing to do with Les Mis. Oh, well, I will eventually do a Les Mis AU.  
> Please please please comment!  
> P.S.: Sorry if there's any grammar mistake and thank you all for reading<3


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